Lera wishes Acher could be redeemed, a little. She still has some sentimental regard for him. A lot of that's been worn away by active efforts to kill her, though, and she sees it as impossible. She's given up on him; if it were to happen, it would have to come from him, because she's decided he has to die and will help make that happen (or do it herself, if given the chance). It's one of those things she'd like but thinks is impossible. Like winning the lottery.

How worried was Vati about Lera going off to fight a war god?